Straight From the WTF Department…

I have been meaning to write about this for awhile now and just now decided to sit down and do it.  NCSoft really confused me with this, everything about Aion has been beautiful and well done, from the character models, to the environment, to the character animations.  Everything I have seen from NCSoft, in regards to Aion, has been outstanding, except for this one thing.  What is this one thing you ask?  What Aion related, NCSoft sanctioned thing can make me ask what the f@#k??  Very simply, it’s this:

WTF IS THIS?!?!

WTF IS THIS?!?!

This is hideous. Absolutely 100% unadulterated ugly.  It has no redeeming features that I can see.  Let’s take it piece by piece.

  • First off, what color is her skin exactly?  The skin tone on her body looks is a sickly greyish tone.  She resembles Zombie Madonna more than an Asmodian.

    Madonna modeling for the Asmodian Figurine.

    Madonna modeling for the Asmodian Figurine.

  • Secondly, we have her facial skin tone, which is, amazingly, worse off than her body skin tone.  It’s not only that sickly grey but is also discolored.  As if she has a severe case of vitiligo, especially around the eyes.
  • Her armor and weapons look horrible.  Too many colors that don’t blend well and all the armor is a flat color with no gloss.  This looks nothing like the gorgeous armor you get in end game Aion, hell it does not even look as nice as the armor my Gladiator had a level ONE, for God’s sakes!
  • The wings are completely underwhelming.  They are not anywhere near the beauty or size of in-game wings, which dominate the silhouette of characters in-game.

    Now THESE are WINGS!

    Now THESE are WINGS!

  • Finally, and this is the worst for me, we have the hair.  The hair is horrible.  What developer okay’d this?  Everytime I see the hair on this figurine I believe the conversation between the developers went something like this:

Korean Developer 1: “Okay, we all know that Aion has been accused of looking to “Asian” by some people in the West, so we really need to come up with the most Western looking figurine that we can. Anyone have any suggestions on the hair?

Original model for the Asmodian female figurine.

Original model for the Asmodian female figurine.

KD2: Hmm, well I think we could really do well to model her after this: (holds up photo of Edward from Twilight)

KD1: Uhm, you do realize the figurine is going to be female, yes?

KD2: Yeah, so?

KD3: Idiot!  That’s a guy!

KD2: Are you sure about that?  Looks like a chick to me…

KD1: Any more suggestions?

KD3: I have the perfect one! She’s scary like an Asmodian, western and she IS a female! (holds up a picture of Joan Rivers)

Western.  But possibly not human!

Western. But possibly not human!

KD1: Western, yes.  Female, probably.  But I am not sure she’s human.  Come on you idiots!  Think of something that would truly identify her as Western!  We are running out of time here!!

KD4: I’ve got it!  I have the perfect hair style.  One look and you will be able to tell instantly that she is American!  This is the perfect American hair style, one that they will identify with immediately…

Group: Damn it!  What?!?!

KD4: Cornrows!  What haircut could possibly say American like CORNROWS!!!

Group: OMG!!  That’s PERFECT!!! How could we have not seen that

Still famous, after all these years!

Still famous, after all these years!

before!  Those American’s love that cornrow haircut!  Look at this:

KD1: You’re right!  Bo Derek is still famous after all these years!  Those Americans love her!  It’s settled then, cornrows it is!  Great job everyone!

Yep.  That’s about how I imagine the conversation leading up to that decision.  The ultimate WTF?!?!

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8 Responses

  1. 100% agree… that said i would rather get a box with a lump of dog poo inside than have it touch my game experience so i dont really care 😛

    .. would rather get the model unpainted TBH… use my 40k shit to make it look kool 😀

  2. Gotta say I’m kinda glad I didn’t get the figurine.

  3. Good thing I am getting the other version of CE. XD

  4. CE version online ftw. Saves $10!

    • Yeah. I wanted the posters though. Plus, I much prefer having a boxed product. I’m behind the times in that respect!

  5. LOL, thanks for the laugh. I needed that today. 🙂

  6. Haha, that’s just an eyesore – not one redeeming feature

  7. Just make a little paper bag and fit it over to convert fail into win.

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